This week I have been suffering from impostor syndrome. This syndrome is:
“The fear that those around you will discover you’re not really as talented or competent as they think.”
Working with 1000 other history professionals (ranging from high school teacher to esteemed college professors) grading world history exams is a little intimidating. Even though they trained us to understand how to grade the student essays I still fear that I am doing it incorrectly. My worry is that the chief reader will march into the huge room where we are all working and loudly declare that I am awful and send me home.
I know of course that they would never do this—but that is the thing with fear it likes to torture us in all sorts of random ways.
Sitting across from me at my table are two college professors who are incredibly nice and they have been very patient as I continue to disturb their reading to ask them random questions that come up in the essay’s that I grade.
If I am being honest, I feel like an imposter most of the time. Since this is such a familiar feeling to me, I manage my anxiety and stress my really focusing on my task. The more I center myself, go over my instructions and ask questions the more confident I become. I have been a part of the reading for 3 years and these feelings arise every single time.
Do you ever feel like an imposter? How do you keep up your confidence in those situations?
In other non-imposter related news, I wanted to share a contest with all of my readers that will end on Monday. Ramit Sethi, my favorite financial guru, writer of I Will Teach You To Be Rich, is giving away $2,002 to someone to help them pay their mortgage/rent. The contest ends on Monday, costs nothing to enter and the more people I refer the more my chances will increase. I think it would be awesome if someone reading this blog won (and I wouldn't mind winning as well :-)). Here is the link if you are interested.